Menu

Articles

Protecting your kids from cyberbulling

  • Written by ARA
The days of the schoolyard bully who set out to take your lunch money or shove you in a locker seem like a dream to kids today. Today’s kids face bullies who utilize technology to take schoolyard antagonism to a whole new and oftentimes dangerous level.

Cyber bullying is the use of technology and information by a minor to torment, threaten, harass, embarrass and otherwise humiliate another child. The Internet, social networking sites, cell phones and other digital and interactive technologies are used to take the bully’s message to a greater audience than ever before, giving them more power to leave their victims humiliated on a global scale.

"It is much easier to bully online than in person," says Dr. Mirjam Quinn, assistant professor of clinical psychology at Argosy University, Chicago. "It is easier to reach a large audience online, there is less, if any, adult supervision governing online behavior and the Internet provides a — sometimes false — sense of anonymity that may lead individuals to behave more aggressively than they would in real life. It is also easier to dehumanize a victim online, since the bully doesn’t see, thus can ignore, the victim’s immediate emotional reaction."

"Victims who experience cyber bullying reveal that they were afraid or embarrassed to go to school. In addition, research has revealed a link between cyber bullying and low self-esteem, family problems, academic problems, school violence and delinquent behavior. Cyber-bullied youth also report having suicidal thoughts, and there have been a number of examples in the United States where youth who were victimized ended up taking their own lives," says Eric Kurt, academic director of the Web Design & Interactive Media program at The Art Institute of Indianapolis.

How do your protect your kids? Set appropriate boundaries and monitor their activity.

"The Internet really isn’t as anonymous as it seems — it is very much real life," says Quinn. "Your parenting rules in real life can and should very much inform the decisions you make about parenting rules regarding cell phone and Internet use."

"It is important that you have access to the technology your child uses the most," says Kurt. If your child has a cell phone, you should communicate that you can and will monitor the text messages that are received and sent. "It’s not a matter of privacy invasion, but of being a parent active in the life of your child," says Kurt.

"Parents should look at and set privacy settings on the sites their children are using. They should also have a list of user accounts that a child has created on the Web, along with the passwords," says Kurt.

Both Kurt and Quinn encourage parents to talk to their kids about appropriate behavior online. Teach them to never post something on the Internet or send a text message that they wouldn’t say to a parent or family member. "Once you send a message or an image out into the world via the Internet or text message, you have no control over where it goes and who will receive it," says Kurt. "Assume that anything posted can, and often will, be made public. If you don’t post anything disrespectful, irresponsible or vulgar, then you don’t have to worry about who is viewing it."

"If bullying ever crosses the line into intimidation or sexual harassment, or affects your child’s ability to feel safe when she is around the bully, then the other child’s parents, the school, community leaders and (depending on the severity of the situation) the police should be contacted immediately. Your child may initially become angry with you for ‘overreacting,’ but you are doing the right thing by showing him that you will take care of him and keep him safe no matter what," says Quinn.

Summer reading programs: a fun and educational way for kids to keep busy

  • Written by ARA

(ARA) — Motivating your children to read during the summer can be a daunting task. After all, once school lets out, the last thing most kids want to think about is more books.

However, studies show that children who read several books during the summer maintain or surpass the reading skills developed during the previous school year. The key is to find ways to motivate kids to read during the lazy days of summer - and to make it fun.

From incorporating movie watching into their summer reading routine to rewarding them with trips to the water park, you can find many ways to give kids the incentive to read during the summer.

Give kids an incentive to read

Just telling your kids that their grades will be better next year by reading during the summer won’t work. Children often need something tangible to motivate them to do something that might be farther down their list than other summer activities. There are several summer reading programs available, such as TD Bank’s Summer Reading Program, that offer rewards. TD Bank’s program rewards kids with $10 for reading 10 books over the summer, with the money deposited into a new or existing Young Saver bank account. More about the program can be found at www.tdbank.com/summerreading.

You can also offer kids incentives that show them the benefits of hard work. Incorporate a bonus into their weekly allowance — one book per week equals a certain amount of bonus allowance. Or set a total goal that, if reached, will reward them with that long-sought video game, pair of athletic sneakers or trip to their favorite restaurant or amusement park.

Another motivational tool is to choose books that have been made into movies, like "Twilight" or "Harry Potter," says Elizabeth K. Warn, president of the TD Charitable Foundation and senior vice president of community development for TD Bank.

"Watch the movies after your child has read the book and compare and contrast the differences," says Warn. "If the movie is out in theatres during the summer, use a trip to the movies as extra motivation to read the books."

Be proactive in their reading programs

Just like homework, sometimes kids need that extra push to meet their summer reading goals. When time permits, sit down with your child while he or she is reading and help with difficult words or phrases by having them read out loud. This helps reduce frustration, especially for very young readers.

Another way to keep your kids excited about summer reading is to turn the experience into a group "play date." Coordinate with other parents in your neighborhood to create a summer reading book club and take turns coordinating the reading sessions weekly, biweekly or monthly throughout the summer.

Incorporate family activities into kids’ summer reading

Like most families, you probably have a family vacation scheduled at some point during the summer. Leading up to your vacation, try to find books at your local library or book store that tell stories about the area where you will be vacationing. If you are planning a family day trip to the zoo or beach, find books about animals or beach activities. Finally, find ways to have fun discussions with your kids about the books they are reading. Ask plenty of questions to get them talking about the characters, stories and what they liked or disliked about the books. The key, again, is to stay involved and find ways to motivate your kids.

Liberty, Freedom and Responsibility

  • Written by Maren Schmidt, M.ED.
"Freedom is not the last word. Freedom is only part of the story and half of the truth. Freedom is but the negative aspect of the whole phenomenon whose positive aspect is responsibleness. In fact, freedom is in danger of degenerating into mere arbitrariness unless it is lived in terms of responsibleness. That is why I recommend that the Statue of Liberty on the East Coast be supplemented with a Statue of Responsibility on the West Coast." — Victor E. Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning

Liberty. An intriguing word, coming from the Latin word "liber" which is the bark of a tree that was used for writing. The word for read in Latin is ‘liber;" the word for book is "libre." Liberty, library, literacy all connect back to the bark of a tree.

In ancient Rome, the test of whether a person was a free man or a slave, was determined if the person could read or write. In many cultures teaching a slave to read was punishable by death. Freedom from slavery and having the rights of a citizen depended on one’s ability to read and write.

Years ago, I worked on learning Russian for about six months. As it happens, life intervenes and when I came back to it, it all looked like funny Greek letters, again. It was a humbling experience. This voracious reader couldn’t remember the Russian alphabet.

Perusing National Geographic magazines, I notice signs in a multitude of languages, such as Chinese, Japanese, Korean and Arabic. Unable to decipher a word, I realize that in those cultures, I am illiterate. There, I would be less than a first class citizen. I would be subject to being unemployed, or victimized due to my inability to use the language fluently. Unable to read and write, I would lose many freedoms. In a new culture it would be important to exercise my right to learn to read and write, and regain those freedoms.

Today in America, according to the National Center for Education Statistics, there are more than 90 million adults who cannot read well enough to understand this article, which measures at an 8.8 grade level on the Flesch-Kincaid Readability Index.

Today we celebrate our country’s Declaration of Independence. "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."

With these words, I believe our founding fathers saw every person as having a right to life, a right to learn how to read, which is liberty, and the right to pursue happiness; rights that we as responsible citizens should be constantly debating and protecting in order to safeguard our freedoms.

Liberty is a right. Liberty becomes freedom when we take the responsibility to learn to read and continue to read. Freedom comes from accepting responsibility for having a right. Freedom is earned by exercising a right. Freedom is earned by taking responsibility. There is no freedom until liberty is joined with responsibility. To remain free, we must read and ensure literacy for everyone. Then freedom can ring, from every mountainside, everywhere for everyone. Our children deserve no less.

Be Friendly with Error

  • Written by Maren Schmidt, M.ED.

Nicholas, a cheerful 3 year old, had cried every day at snack time for a week. Because he had spilt a pitcher of water on the snack table, Nicholas refused to try to pour himself a drink of water. Efforts to encourage Nicholas to pour an eight-ounce pitcher were met with tears. "I can’t. I’ll spill and make a mess and everybody will be mad at me."

Pouring water in a Montessori classroom is a critical skill because so many other lessons involve water or pouring, such as hand washing, table washing, and cloth washing, to name a few. Nicholas had such a fear of failure at pouring, that I didn’t know how to get him over this obstacle.

In the middle of the night, when most inspiration seems to arrive, I had an idea. The next morning, I told my classroom assistant that I was going to give a cloth-washing lesson and in the process "accidentally" spill a large pitcher of water. Could she encourage children to set up away from my presentation area to avoid more chaos than necessary?

During the lesson to an older student, I "tripped" and a half-gallon of water rushed over the hardwood floors. "Oops," I laughed, surveying the water. "It’s okay. It will clean up. It’s just water."

To my surprise, Nicholas arrived, mop in hand, asking if he could help me.

"That would be lovely," I replied.

Nicholas and I mopped and dried the floor, checking that every drop was gone so our friends wouldn’t slip on a wet floor. We laughed and sang, "… down came the rain and washed the spider out. Out came Nicholas to dry up all the rain …"

"When a big person spills, it’s a big spill," I joked with Nicholas.

Mike, a 4 year old, walked up and said, "See, Nicholas, I told you it’s okay to make a mistake at school."

Nicholas broke into a wide grin and turned to put the mop away.

Later that morning, Nicholas came to me. "Ms. Maren, did you spill that water just for me?"

"What do you mean, Nicholas?"

"Did you spill it to make me feel better?"

Now it was my turn to feel as though a bucket of water had just dumped over my head, like in the old 70’s Laugh-In show. Sock-it-to-me.

I thought I was a better actress that that. I imagined myself to be more convincing to a 3 year old.

"Thank you, Ms. Maren. I’m not scared to pour anymore." Nicholas gave me a hug.

"You’re welcome, Nicholas." I took a deep breath.

Thank you, I thought, for helping me remember to be friendly with error.

 

Kids Talk TM deals with childhood development issues. Maren Schmidt founded a Montessori school and holds a masters of education from Loyola College in Maryland. She has over 25 years experience working with children and holds teaching credentials from the Association Montessori Internationale. She is author of "Building Cathedrals Not Walls: Essays for Parents and Teachers."

Contact her at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. or visit www.MarenSchmidt.com.Copyright 2011.

Essential Math Skills for Life

  • Written by Maren Schmidt, M.Ed.
As a six-year-old, mom would send me off walking for milk, eggs or bread to the mom-and-pop grocery six blocks away. These shopping errands were big math builders for me. For half a mile I had to keep in mind that a loaf of bread and a carton of eggs were 59 cents and the change would be 41 cents. What a difference 40 years (and change) makes.

As I watch in the stores, our children have few opportunities to see or use money, and to develop the math skills that dealing with money creates. I’ve worked with many savvy six year olds who did not know the difference between a nickel, dime and quarter. To them it was just money. These children had no concrete experience in counting, saving or making purchases with cash, since checks, debit and credit cards handled most family purchases. For many children under the age of nine, $37.62 is an abstract idea with no concrete, hands-on experience.

Fourth grade seems to be the point where lack of math concepts becomes a stumbling block. Having tutored math through college algebra, I can share a few fundamental concepts that struggling students of all ages have lacked. Understanding place value, the decimal system, the four basic math operations, fractions, along with telling time, are common missing math skills.

Place value and the decimal system are concepts that can be easily shown and understood before the age of six. A lot of math frustration can be prevented with the knowledge that our number system is built on groups of 10 items. We count in units, whether the units are pennies, dollars, minutes or eggs. The unit is the building block of any number system. Calling units "ones" can create confusion for some people trying to understand the difference between numerals and how numbers work in place value.

Our number system, the decimal system, is based on groups of 10 starting with the unit. When we have 10 units, we can exchange them for a new group containing ten units called "10s." Ten units make a10. Ten 10s make a hundred. Ten hundreds make a thousand. When we write a 10, it represents an amount that has one group of 10s in the 10s’ place and no units in the unit’s place. 100 represents one hundred, no 10s, and no units. Pennies, dimes and dollars are examples of units, tens and hundreds. Using money with children can help develop a firm understanding of place value. Ten pennies can be exchanged for a dime. Ten dimes make a dollar. Ten dollars make a 10-dollar bill. Using money as a manipulative, children at the ages of five, six and seven, can easily add, subtract, multiply and divide three and four digit numbers, such as $17.59 + $5.97.

Understanding how to use the four basic math operations in story problems and real life circumstances is another math obstacle. Knowing there are only four basic math operations--addition, subtraction, multiplication and division (yes, even in algebra)—ends much confusion. Again, using money for a hands-on teaching tool helps children see how the math operations work.

Fractions can be a challenge. Measuring with a ruler, tape measure, and cooking with measuring cups help give fractions real life meaning. Basic math operations with fractions come easily when the decimal system and place value are understood first by using money.

Telling time on an analog clock (with hands) is an overlooked skill that is important to geometry, the study of angles, and finding direction. A private pilot friend told me the hardest part of learning to fly was getting a quick picture in his mind when the instructor said "Plane at your two o’clock."

Use money to help your preschooler become proficient in the important math concepts of the decimal system and place value. (Please note: Use pennies, dimes and dollars first. Introduce nickels, quarters, half dollars and five dollars later.) Make up money story problems using three and four digit numbers and the four math operations. Use measuring cups, rulers, and measuring tapes. Have a clock with hands in your kitchen. Make math real and hands-on for your child and number work will be fun for life.

Kids Talk TM deals with childhood development issues. Maren Schmidt founded a Montessori school and holds a Masters of Education from Loyola College in Maryland. She has over 25 years experience working with children and holds teaching credentials from the Association Montessori Internationale. She is author of Building Cathedrals Not Walls: Essays for Parents and Teachers. Contact her at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. or visit www.MarenSchmidt.com. Copyright 2011.